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CATACLYSM

An EARTHIAN fanfiction by Komadori-chan MD

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Chapter One: Dreams to Dream

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The days that followed crept by slowly, but without further incident—the nightmares that had plagued the younger angel having curiously ceased to play...  or so it seemed.  Chihaya slept quietly throughout the nights now, much to Kagetsuya’s relief.  However, the dark angel’s unusual display of edginess did not subside, but instead shadowed his increasing listlessness.

 

Kagetsuya had said nothing of this, out of respect to his mate, but grew less and less accommodating with each passing day—though in his dazed state, Chihaya barely noticed the change in his mood.  But that hardly surprised him, for Chihaya barely noticed anything anymore if it wasn’t pointed out to him.  It was such a startling contrast from the vibrant, violet-haired boy he’d fallen in love with—the one who had always burned with more life than any single creature had a right to... the one who now stared lifelessly into infinity, amaryllis eyes flat and bleak with hopelessness. 

 

It was enough to make his heart ache...  But at least he was aware of the source of this enigmatic depression, if nothing else.

 

It seemed that there was something more to those dreams that was disturbing the violet-eyed youth— something that he refused to talk about—and whatever it was, it was beginning to visibly drain the life and vitality out of his lover.  Obviously, the silence was getting them nowhere even faster, but Kagetsuya still knew better than to press the issue.   Doing so would only cause what tension already existed to grow worse... and some things just could not be rushed.  When Chihaya was ready to discuss it, he would.

 

But no amount of reasoning could stay the whispering voice in the back of his mind that kept insisting that Chihaya would wait too long to do so...  And for as irrational as that voice was, Kagetsuya couldn’t help but wonder...

 

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Hazy eyes of midnight blue fluttered open slowly, their slight iciness softened in the dim glow of twilight.  A thick fringe of dusky lashes swept over lightly flushed skin as Kagetsuya stirred from the indulgent embrace of slumber.  Giving a subtle stretch to loosen up his aching joints, he let his gaze fall on the empty spot next to him.  Reaching out, his hand encountered surprisingly cold sheets... Chihaya had been gone for quite some time already.  Sighing, Kagetsuya rolled over on his back, unwilling to look at the intimate impression that his partner had left behind in the comforter and pillows—another reminder of their new, uncomfortable reality.

 

For a long minute he lay still, eyes narrowed in concentration as he listened to his surroundings.  Carefully, he began sorting and placing various insignificant rumblings of sound—the quiet growl of early morning traffic below, a songbird perched outside the window, the tinkling of crystal wind chimes blowing in the breeze—but he found nothing to indicate Chihaya's whereabouts.  But that was just as well, he supposed.  Who would expect the former positive checker to be up and actively doing something this early in the morning—especially in light of recent developments?

 

'He's probably off somewhere brooding again...'

 

Burying himself back under the bulky, quilted comforter, Kagetsuya cocooned himself in the sheets—something that Chihaya had been more apt to doing on particularly chill days—and contemplated staying comfortably bundled like so for an extra hour this morning.  But for as tempting as the concept was—and really, Kagetsuya wanted more than nothing than to forget all of his problems for a few hours at the very least—the golden-haired angel found, quite miserably, that he could not get truly comfortable.  It was difficult to feel any satisfaction in toasty, warm blankets on a cold day when you were in bed alone.

 

Sucking his teeth in irritation, the flaxen haired angel pushed himself up on his elbows, feeling the covers fall to his waist in a huge, downy pile.  Straightening himself until he sat completely upright, Kagetsuya took a deep breath and raked a hand through his wavy, Earthian style locks, his fingers combing through the deceptively short strands with ease.  Well, if there was anything good to be said about having to disguise himself as an Earthian, it was the luxury of going to sleep without having to tie back or possibly even braid his hair first. Long hair was hard enough to manage without getting it all tangled up by sleeping with it down as well.

 

Soundlessly, he slipped from underneath the heavy covers, noting vaguely how smoothly they slid over the silky fabric of his pajamas—another wasted indulgence.  Reflexively, he smoothed his hands over the soft, shiny material, watching as it rippled and gleamed like cream-colored water, cool and feathery beneath his fingertips as he repaired his rumpled appearance. Yes, water indeed... flowing and sexy against his hot skin... but like the bed sheets, unappealing to his senses in his overpowering concern for his wayward boyfriend.

 

Perhaps that more than anything else was responsible for his inability to enjoy anything lately.  Chihaya's apparent misery made it impossible for him to feel good without also feeling guilty.  More recently, the sun wasn't quite was warm, the water not as refreshing... even his food was beginning to taste like cotton to him.  This oppressive atmosphere was starting to weigh heavily on him, and if something wasn't done soon, he had a feeling that Chihaya would be dragging the both of them down.

 

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As he had suspected he would, Kagetsuya found Chihaya perched on a window seat in their spare bedroom at the top of the stairs.  The dark angel slouched languidly against the pane, one knee drawn up, to which his arms wrapped about protectively as he stared pensively out into the still-bleak, gray sky morning.  There was a sad, wistful sort of expression etched into his delicate features, which, in the filtered light of dusk, made Chihaya look more like a melancholy pastel than a real person.

 

"Chihaya-kun..."

 

Misted amethyst eyes, sunken and over wide, blinked in surprise as they riveted on him, “Ara, Kage-sa... a... ano...”

 

“Daijoubu ka?”

 

“H-hai... gomen nasai... I didn’t hear you come in...” came the weak reply.

 

“That’s okay,” Kagetsuya said, “How are you this morning?”

 

“Fine”

 

It was a lie and they both knew it, but Kagetsuya made no further remarks on the issue.  Instead, he offered one of a set of steaming ceramic mugs to his lover.  Chihaya stared blankly at it for a few moments before accepting it; obviously, he hadn’t noticed that his partner had been carrying hot chocolate with him either.  Flashing him a rather faint, wilted smile more reminiscent of a grimace, Chihaya became absorbed in the life-defining task of blowing away the thick clouds of whirling steam.  Frowning slightly, Kagetsuya glanced into his own mug of swirling cocoa with no small amount of disinterest and made an indistinguishable sound in the back of his throat.

 

“Ne?” Chihaya asked quietly, peering at his lover curiously through the curling wisps of white.  Meekly, he clutched his cup in both hands and ventured a tiny sip when he noticed the hard, cutting glare he got.  Kagetsuya looked very angry indeed.

 

Kagetsuya, meanwhile, had just noticed his mate look at him and blanch.  Mentally, he gave himself a swift kick in the ass as he realized what kind of sour expression he must be sporting to scare the younger man that way. 

 

Clearing his throat, he placed his mug down on a nearby table and moved to sit down next to the dark-haired youth, waiting silently as Chihaya swung his legs in to give him enough space to do so.  Leaning against the opposite pane, Kagetsuya tried a soothing smile, “Gomen, Chihaya... I did not mean to upset you like that.  I’m not angry with you.”

 

“You... you’re not?” Chihaya blinked in surprise, still eyeing him warily.

 

“No.  I...” there was a short pause as he pondered his response, “I’ve just been a little worried about you lately, that’s all,” he said as truthfully as possible.  Then, as an afterthought, he added, “It... it just upsets me...” he trailed off, unable to piece together the right words to convey his thoughts correctly.

 

Not that Chihaya really needed him to continue.  They both knew what it was.

 

“Gomen ne, Kagetsuya...”

 

“No,” Kagetsuya shook his head and placed a gentle hand on his partner’s shoulder for emphasis, “don’t be.  It isn’t your fault.”

 

There was a long, meaningful silence and Kagetsuya found himself nearly drowning in those incredible amethyst eyes, almost forgetting himself for a moment and letting his hand drift upward to cup Chihaya’s cheek.  The dark angel closed his eyes and leaned into him readily, but Kagetsuya didn’t miss the depleted, heavy feeling behind it, which was far from what his heart had hoped for.  ‘Even now... but it’s wrong of me, Chihaya...’ he mused sadly as he forced himself to withdraw and turn away before he did something stupid. 

 

“Anyway,” he said suddenly, moving to stand, “since we’re both up already, why don’t we go make a trip down to the bakery on the corner and catch them when they open?”

 

“Ah...” Chihaya’s mind spun at the abrupt change of subject, “bakery?”

 

Kagetsuya smiled down at him tiredly, “Yes, we’ll go get those crème puffs you like so much... while they’re still warm.  What do you say?”

 

“Really?”

 

“Really, really.”

 

And for the first time in longer than he cared to remember, Chihaya actually smiled.

 

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The sky was already highlighted with brilliant streaks of magenta and tangerine when the two Earth-bound angels emerged from their apartment building and set out through the sparsely occupied streets of uptown Shinjuku toward the City Park.  The air was crisp with a slight breeze, tinting Chihaya’s cheeks with a vibrant, rosy blush as he carefully stretched out his limbs, coaxing his muscles into fluid mobility.  Kagetsuya watched with a small smile of admiration as his lover took advantage of each crossing and intersection, using the wait to slowly warm up—flexing and gently straining each muscle group in methodical succession—until he was fully limber.  This side of Chihaya was always refreshing to experience; his blossoming independence, amazing lucidity, and quiet confidence showed through so rarely that, at times, Kagetsuya wondered if Chihaya even realized them.  However, there was always a drawback to this erstwhile display—it always accompanied long periods of brooding on Chihaya’s part.

 

Thankfully, though, the violet-eyed angel had had a shift in mood earlier, when Kagetsuya had suggested a brisk morning jog in the park and a trip to the neighborhood bakery to help ease some of the tension, and had remained somewhat amiable since then.  For the most part, this change of atmosphere was welcomed readily... yet, at the same time, Kagetsuya had to wonder just how much effort Chihaya was putting into this front.  He never realized before how convincing Chihaya could be at pretending everything was fine—should the time call for it—but there was something just detectable in his mate’s eyes that continued to whisper of a deeper sorrow—a burning misery of the soul.  Even through the smiles, Chihaya was still crying... but even in suffering, Chihaya would still always be beautiful to him.

 

“Na... Kagetsuya!” Chihaya chirped brightly, cutting through the other’s absorbing thoughts.

 

“Nani?” Kagetsuya blinked, disoriented.

 

Chihaya giggled at the seemingly blank expression that had registered on his partner’s fact when he had called to him.  Twirling about energetically, he abruptly broke into a moderate run, leaving a mildly distracted Kagetsuya behind, still stuck somewhere halfway between his thoughts and reality.  "Follow me, Kage-chan!  The park is right ahead! Hurry!”

 

Kagetsuya hesitated, hanging back briefly before rolling up on his heels and jogging after Chihaya. So lost in his musings earlier, he had failed to warm up properly.  Now he followed at a pace much slower, almost awkward pace for what he was used to.

 

On his way, he crossed a provocatively dressed pair of lovers, their identical trench coats blending almost indistinguishably against their glossy raven hair in the insufficient lighting.  They looked as if they might be going home from a particularly draining night on the town—a nightclub, perhaps—lingering tiredly beneath the flame-like glow of the street lamps.  They nodded to him in unison, a nonverbal signal of greeting, their topaz eyes cool and appraising.  Kagetsuya felt the heat rising in his cheeks at their probing stares.  Maybe they had heard Chihaya call him “Kage-chan”?  Giving them a curt nod in return, he forced himself to look straight ahead.  He would have to remember to remind Chihaya to be mindful of how he addressed him in public.  Earthians might be more liberal about homosexuality than their own in Eden, but that certainly didn’t mean that they could flaunt it openly either.

 

But even as the unnerving couple faded into the distance, he could still feel their disapproving gazes tingling like ice against the back of his neck... and for some odd reason, he knew that they weren’t doing it because of what they’d heard.  And on some irrational level, that scared him.

 

Pressing forward harder, Kagetsuya rushed to catch up with Chihaya, for once in his life wanting nothing more than the quiet and relative safety of the inside of Kamura’s Pastry Shop.  Something definitely didn’t feel right... and he had a feeling that it was only a matter of time before the other shoe dropped.

 

 

 

 

 

... to be continued ...

 

 

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