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WANNA PILOT DEATHSCYTHE HELL?

A GUNDAM WING fanfiction by Komadori-chan MD

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Email: kchan_md@yahoo.com

Archive: http://freewebz.com/disillusionment/

Pairing: 1x2, 02x01

Warnings: yaoi content, slight bashing, language, & reference to mecha sex

Disclaimer: Fanfiction is written for entertainment purposes only and not for profit.  Presented characters and storylines were manipulated without permission.  Unless otherwise stated, all related content is exclusive property of Sunrise & Sotsu Agency; all original portions of written fiction are sole property of the author.

Published: 08-25-01

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Guide: () = thoughts, [] = author commentary, :::: = actions, feelings, reactions, etc, <> translations

 

{{ Enter scene: Duo and Heero's usual stereotype room }}

Duo: ::Walks into the room with a huge smirk on his face.  Obviously, he's been admiring his mecha again-- then again, who wouldn't?::  So... whatcha think of my Shinigami, spandex boy?  Pretty sweet ride, wouldn't ya say?  ::nudge nudge::

Heero: <.< ::Could care less about any mobile suit that isn't his::  Hn.  ::makes it a point to turn on his laptop and "ignore" Duo for the rest of this fic::

Duo: ::Disappointed::  Aw, c'mon Heero!  You KNOW that D-Hell kicks ass even BETTER than Wing!  ::poke poke::

MD: ::Inserts herself briefly::  And not to mention, TAKES more ass. XD

Duo: ::Blinks::  >.>  MD?  What are you doing in here?

Heero: ::Perks and actually looks up from the screen::  And what the hell did you mean by that last remark?

MD: ::Smmmmiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirrrkkkkkkk::  Well, not to go strictly 2x1 on you guys... but do you remember the first time you guys met?

D & H: ::Nod::

MD: Or more precisely, when Duo first found Wing?

D & H: ::Nod::

MD: And he didn't know Heero had meant to try and destroy it and deactivated the self-destruct mode?

Heero: ? ::Iz clueless::

Duo: ::Realizes the implications::  O_o  ::bluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuush::  You SAW that?

MD: Deathscythe was getting some LONG before you ever did, braid boy! XD

Duo: ::Sputtering::  Hey! That's NOT fair, MD!

Heero: What the heck is she talking about?  What did she see?  ::Eyes the other boy purposely::

MD: ^_^  Nandemo nai , Hee-chan! ::Waves it off:: "Inside" joke... thass all... ::breaks of into another peal of laughter and stumbles back out of the fic::

Duo: O.O  ::Iz having some REALLY hentai thoughts concerning Gundams 01 and 02::

Heero: ...  ::Looks pissed for not being able to get the punchline::

Duo: ::Cough::  Eh... where were we?  ::fidgets::  (My GOD, I never thought of it that way!)

Heero: ::Gllllllllllaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeee::

Duo: ^_^;;;  Uh... um... yeah.  D-Hell would whoop Wing any day...  ::Hopes Heero will just forget it and get back to the story at hand:: (I wonder what would happen if Gundams could procreate?)

[O_O  Gundams?  Procreate?  ::Falls over laughing and goes about writing THAT fic too for the heck of it::]

Heero: ::Never one to disappoint::  Ch'! ::Stares at his computer screen even harder::

Duo: ::Smirks again and gets back into the swing of things::  Come on, Hee-kun... I'll make ya a deal.  Take Deathscythe out for a quick spin and see how she handles.  I'll bet you LIKE her.  If you don't, I'll leave you alone.

Heero: ... ::Thinks about it::  No.  [Cause we all KNOW he doesn't want Duo to leave him alone... LOL]

Duo: *buh-link* No?

Heero: No.

Duo: Why not?

Heero: I have my own mobile suit-- that's enough for me.  Besides, I don't need to fly yours to know it handles well.  I've SEEN her in action before.

Duo: ::Tap tap tap::  Is that the best you could come up with?  Geez Heero!  ::throws up his hands::  That's not an excuse!

Heero: Excuse?  Why should I need to explain myself?  I have nothing to prove!  ::Doesn't bother pretending to look at his laptop any longer::

Duo: ::Practically leering::  You know what I think?  ::Comes to stand nose to nose with Heero::  I think you're just DYING to find out what it's like...  ::uses the patented Shinigami voice of seduction (tm)::  [::Cough cough::  Wonder what Duo’s REALLY talking about? XD]

{{::Several swoons and fangirl/boi squeals can be heard. Faintly, one can hear Wufei grumbling as he mops up the drool that's starting to puddle around the fic::}}

Heero: ::Squirms slightly::

Duo: ::Backs off suddenly::  But you're just too damn proud to admit it.

Heero: ::Struggles to regain his lost composure::  You have nothing on me, Maxwell.

Duo: ::Snorts::  Sure.  We'll see...  ::Goes over to the room's desk and pulls open the top drawer to search for something::

Heero: ::Fuming:: (That Duo Maxwell... that... DUO MAXWELL... oh... damn it to HELL that Duo Maxwell!  ::blinks::  Waitaminute!  That sounds so stupid!!  Who the hell wrote this script anyway?!)  ::Peeks at the book::

MD: ::Reappears quickly::  How easily we forget...

Heero: >.>  Go away.

MD: ::Shrugs::  Fine... be that way.  ::Half hearted glare::  We’ll just see what happens to you in the end of "Crude Humor" when I get done with the last chapter! XD ::Disappears::

Heero: ::Sweatdrop::  Kuso... >.<

Duo: ::Comes back smiling, with two sets of scrolled papers::  Wanna pilot Deathscythe Hell?

Heero: ::Knows that he's about to face another drawn out Duo-style taunt::  No.  I will not fly her, Duo Maxwell... I will not pilot Deathscythe Hell.  ::Crosses his arms defiantly::  (And give you the satisfaction? Never!)

Duo: ::Ignores Heero's rejection and flicks out the scrolls to reveal maps of two different areas::  Would you fly her here or there?

Heero: <.<  I would not fly her here or there.  I would not fly her anywhere.  I will not fly her, Duo Maxwell.  I will not pilot Deathscythe Hell.  Now stop making me repeat myself.

Duo: Why is that?  ::Mischievous grin::

Heero: You WON'T change my mind.

Duo: We'll see about that.  ::Opens the closet and starts rummaging::

Heero: ::Rubs his temples::  Damnit, this is going to be a long day.  -_-   (Mental note. Kill Dr. Seuss if the bastard isn't already dead and then MD for making me do this.  Damned incompetent writers...)

[Oh bitch bitch.  Don't you EVER stop complaining, Heero? XD]

Heero: (Actually, if you want to know... no.)

[Eh?  Heero?  How did you hear me?  I’m not even in the fic right now!]

Heero: (Nevermind that.  You’d just better start planning on how you’re going to protect yourself when I get out of here...)

[Ooh... feisty today, aren’t we?]

Heero: >.<  (Shut up bitch!)  ::Begins ripping up the script::  (I don’t have to take this from you!)

Duo: ::Watches with a pained expression::  Uh, Heero?   Are you okay?  ::Blink::

Heero: >.>  Why do ask that?  ::Iz beginning to breathe hard::

Duo: You just ruined the script!

Heero: I hate this damn thing!  Screw the script!  The just wing it already!  And make it quick! >.<

Duo: ::Sweatdrop::  Damn... impatient, aren’t we?  you must be REALLY horny today, huh? ^^;;;

Heero: ...  ::Quirk?::  Hn.  Maybe.  ::Slow, evil smile forms::

Duo: ::Perk!::  Hounto????  ::Glomps onto Heero’s arm::

Heero: ::Smirks and whispers::  Hurry up with this damn scene and we can go home and I’ll show you what I’d REALLY like to ride...

Duo: ^^  ::Blush::

[O_O  Heero?!  The the F#*@ are you doing?!!!]

Heero: (Whatever the hell I want!  Try and stop me!)  Come on Duo...

Duo: Uh... ::Starts firing questions at Heero at machine gun speed::  Would you fly it near or far?  Would you fly to stop the war?  ::Nuzzle nuzzle::

Heero: Iie.   ::Smiles down at Duo, still cuddling his arm::

Duo: Would you fly to Paris, France?  Only in your underpants?  XD

Heero: <.<  ::Cough cough::

Duo: To the heart of outerspace?  Just to give the Bitchcraft chase?

Quatre: ::Appears:: Hey!  Don’t make fun of my Uchuu no Kokoro!  

Duo: >.>  Q?  Where the heck did you come from?

Quatre: ::Blink blink::  Erm... I don’t know, actually.  <.<  I thought I was with Trowa a second ago?

Trowa: You were, Little One.

Quatre: >.>  Trowa!  ^^  ::Glomp!::

Trowa: ...

Heero: ...

Trowa: ::Steers Quatre out the door::  Sorry, but if you’ll excuse us...  ::Leaves::

Duo: Um...

Heero: ::Scowls::  Nice attempt, MD.  It didn’t work.

MD: ::Steps out of the shadows::  So sue me...

Duo: Why?

MD: Heero’s trying to sabotage this fic!  I had to TRY to sidetrack you two!

Duo: But...  ::Gets all teary eyed::  please???

MD: >.>  ::Sweatdrop::

Duo: ::Lip quivers::

MD: -_-;;;

Duo: PLEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAASSSSSEEEEEEE?????

MD: ::Throws hands up in the air*::  Fine!  Do whatever you like!  But you’d better make sure that this is received well!

Duo: ::Salutes::  Yes ma’am!  ^_~

MD: ::Re-exits, grumbling::

Heero: You were saying?

Duo: ::Blinkies::  Oh!  ^^;;;  Gomen!  

Heero: ::Rolls eyes::

Duo: ::Ahem!:: To the moon, to the sun?  When you’re bored, just for fun?

Heero: ::Shakes head no::

Duo: Will you fly her to confront Zechs?  Or how about to get home faster to have sex?

Heero: ::BLUSH::  Duo...

Duo: Yeah, yeah... I have a one track mind... can you blame me?

Heero: ...

Duo: ::Getting antsy::  For the mission?  For a friend?  Just to make this damn fic end?!

Heero: ::thinks about it::

Duo: If you won’t fly her for any of this... would you fly her for a kiss?

Heero: ::Quirk::  A kiss?  Is that all?

Duo: ::Smirks::  Well, you’d get much more if you said yes to something so we could hurry up and leave!  ::Taps foot impatiently::

Heero: ::sly smile::  Now who’s the horny one?

Duo: >.>  You know what, Yuy?  Bite me.

Heero: Ryoukai.    ::Grabs him::

Duo: O.o  ACK!!!  ::Squirm::  But Heero!  Everyone’s watching us!

Heero: Let them.  ::Scoops Duo up::

Duo: Hee-ro!  ::turns a very attractive shade of red::

Heero: I’ll tell you what... I’ll take Deathscythe out for a spin, to all those places and more... but on one condition...

Duo: ::pause:: ...which is...?

Heero: ::grins wickedly::  YOU have to be in the cockpit with me.

Duo: ::mirrors Heero’s suggestive leer:: Why Heero, whatever gave you the idea that I was going to trust you alone with my mecha ever again?

Heero: ::shrugs and keeps on leering::

Duo: ::cackles as he’s carried out of the room::  I knew you’d see things my way eventually.

{{And they lived happily ever after... or something like it...}}

THE END

 

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